I gave up gluten. Then real hell broke loose.

Has this ever happened to you?

I know it’s been too long since I’ve written. I’ve been in quiet combat over the last several weeks. Here’s what’s transpired.

Flashback to a few months ago: I quit gluten, high on the hope that it would make me feel better. I’d been feeling lousy—exhausted, irritable, weak, and bloated. This, despite being told I was in "endoscopic remission" by my gastroenterologist back in September.

So I replaced regular bread with its gluten-free counterpart. I relished the comfort of believing I could still enjoy my emotionally satisfying snack while steering clear of the nefarious gluten.

Then the initial wave of ‘nuh-uh-this-isn’t-working’ came. First, I was met with more sluggishness. Huh. More of what I was trying to eradicate with the diet alterations. Interesting.

Next came the pain—that’s when you really start listening, right?

The hurt came on intermittently and established itself as a faint, dull ache on the left side of my lower abdomen, obscured beneath a sea of other sensory signals. Soon after, I noticed myself shifting around in discomfort when seated to read a book or perhaps ingest a couple of hours of Netflix (hey, don’t judge! And it is gluten-free, isn’t it?)

Giant red exclamation marks started flashing in my head. Ulcerative Colitis mainly affects the descending colon—exactly the location where I was detecting problems—an area I was all too familiar with from previous colonoscopy reports.

From that point, it only took another two weeks for the problem to reveal itself in more undeniable ways:

1. Frequent bathroom runs

2. Cutting, radiating pangs of pain

3. And eventually — mucus and blood in the toilet.

The sight of the latter remains unsettling, even for someone who’s dealt with the disease for years. And since nothing seemed to mitigate the pain, on one particularly insufferable morning I ended up in hospital emergency, begging for answers (and morphine) from the ER nurse, as I had other times.

CT scan results showed that a mild flare-up had begun to take root in the lower stretch of my colon. Peculiarly, this mildness pierced me like nothing I’d ever experienced before, even with more severe relapses. It also invited my bladder along for the joyride of unwelcome symptoms — a persistent “UTI-esque” burn that the doctor explained was the result of the inflamed colon pressing against my bladder.

Like the renowned Math Lady meme (but the IBS version who ruminates on the toilet) I plunged into weighty deliberation, mentally reviewing the foods I had devoured over the last few weeks and months to see which had equated to the nightmare that now unfolded.

Was it the new addition to my diet—the gluten-free bread? But it was just…all too innocent to be a contender, being so blamelessly soft and spongy…a fluffy food cloud of consolation I leaned into to convince myself my culinary world hadn’t changed all that much. Surely it wasn’t the culprit of this hellish development?

Italy Bread GIF by Sara Dietschy

A quick inspection of the dubious ingredient list on the infidel bread’s packaging proved me wrong: modified tapioca starch, corn starch, brown rice flour, modified food starch, sunflower oil, dextrose.

Corn starch and brown rice? My old bowel bullies. The rest? A processed nightmare for anyone, let alone someone with autoimmune sensitivities.

Why hadn’t I taken the time to inspect this offender list before? Denial, I think. A refusal to face the reality of what going gluten-free truly entails. In other words, we cannot merely replace one convenience with another. My problems weren’t going to disappear with a simple wheat-to-some-other-questionable-ingredients switcheroo.

One must get strategic AF about going gluten-free

And so, the confounding realization: going gluten-free had triggered this ulcerative colitis relapse. It was a tough cookie to swallow (pun absolutely intended). Looking back, I wasn’t doing all that badly before the change. Sure, there were subpar days, but they were nothing compared to the agony I was now enduring.

Another tough truth? Bread, gluten-free or not, is still processed food. It’s problematic for many, but especially for those with autoimmunity, where food sensitivities run rampant.

If I’m truly committing to the #GFLife, I need to do better—filling my plate with real, wholesome foods, not pre-packaged substitutes. Maybe it’s time to try my hand at bread baking, with fewer, simpler ingredients and no preservatives.

This experience has illuminated something I’ve long resisted: making genuine restorative changes in my life. But now that I see it, I feel ready to take action.

So, I’m going back to the drawing board—or should I say, the cutting board. I’ll focus on eating more vegetables and fruits in their natural state. I’ll keep a modest amount of wheat in my diet for the carbs I need. I’ve already eliminated sugar, alcohol, and excessive caffeine, and I’ve noticed a difference.

And to anyone about to embark on major dietary changes, I’ll leave you with this: think twice about your substitutions. Convenience isn’t always your friend.